parenting and family

Why having kids is bonkers (if you’re addicted to comfort). Hot take: If your life is all about chasing pleasure, getting the newest shiny thing, and looking for your next dopamine hit, then yeh – having kids is nuts. They’re messy, noisy, and they’ll likely ruin your dreams of becoming a social media influencer. But look around: something bigger is going on with those dropping birth rates.

Sure, economics matters. But my Irish grandparents had five kids, and they didn’t exactly summer in the Bahamas. I’ve seen families in Africa with seven or eight kids despite barely scraping by. So maybe it’s not just about money.

We’ve built a culture that’s an adult daycare for the comfort-addicted. We’re encouraged – by society, marketing, and that little voice in our heads – to stay immature consumers. It’s profitable and predictable, right? Because if you’re constantly shopping, scrolling, or swiping, you’re not rocking the boat.

From a purely “maximise pleasure” angle, kids are a bonkers choice. They’ll cost you sleep, money, and the ability to go to your hot yoga class. But historically, people saw beyond short-term gratification. They had kids out of a sense of meaning, continuity, legacy. Today, we’re not just lacking cash; we’re starved for connection to something bigger than our own endless entertainment feed.

So, it’s about more than just economics. It’s a spiritual crisis. We’re collectively disconnected from the deeper stuff: community, purpose, “God” (call it what you like). And until we find our way back to that, birth rates might keep plummeting because, honestly, who wants to sacrifice the “me me me” of their Netflix-binging comfort for “grown-up responsibilities”?

I’m not saying everyone has to have kids. But maybe it’s time we grew up. I’m certainly thinking about it 😉 Or at least started asking the uncomfortable questions: Do we want a life that’s only about the next hit, or might there be more to it? Believe me, I’ve tried it and it’s not all it’s cracked up to be. That’s why I’m planning some pretty big life changes.

Anyway, that’s just something to chew on. Just do so before your next Amazon package arrives.